So you’re the best man, huh? We’re not going to lie to you – you’ve got one of the toughest jobs going when it comes to weddings. You’ve got to be funny, organised, sensitive, understanding, involved and above it all is the pressure to make it perfect for your mate – after all, the clue’s in the job title, you’re supposed to be the best man remember? Before anything else bookmark Staggered and then work your way through this little lot…
Top 3 Most-Common Best Man Fears (and How We Can Help)
1. The Stag Do
The stag do: done right it is the mother and father of all knees-up, but unfortunately you only get one chance to get it right. Fortunately, we’ve got all the stag do ideas you need to make sure that the groom’s goodbye to bachelorhood goes with a bang. We have truckloads of advice and everything you need to book an awesome stag weekend without the hassle and stress. Here’s a few ideas to get you started:
2. Writing and Delivering The Best Man Speech
If you’re worried about your best man speech then you need to get yourself onto our page about wedding speeches. We know this can be a particularly nerve-racking experience. Our incredible writers have seen their fair share of cocked up speeches, along with a number of genuine and brilliant ones. All of these experiences have provided us with a strong foundation into what makes a great best man speech and what does not. Need a little nudge in the right direction? Have a browse through our list below.
3. Saying “But, I didn’t know I had to do that”
Fear not, you are in the right place. Here at Staggered our editorial mission can be reduced to three little words: Weddings. Blokes. Sorted. The only fear you’ll be left with is being asked to be Best Man again and again. We can’t tell you what’s going to happen on the big day, but we can prepare you for all eventualities from choosing your drinks, to dealing with pageboys and ringbearers. Get some more advice here:
Best Man Duties and Responsibilities
Wondering what your responsibilities are as best man? Worried you’ll forget something? Check your best man duties here.
Before the Wedding:
Plan the Stag Do
You are the bestman. You will be nothing less than epic. That means organising things from drinking games to sourcing the best UK stag destinations. Luckily we have you covered on all these fronts and for many more.
Help choose the wedding suits
It’s your responsibility to not only get all the ushers/groomsmen together and actually find somewhere to get yourself made to measure suits, you also need to go about emailing your men and getting their exact measurements, from leg inseam, waist, chest and more. It will be worth it though, when you’re all looking a million dollars behind the groom.
Write and practice the best man speech
It’s the one that all best men fear. Rather than panic and give a botched job whereby you insult the bride, talk about the grooms ex-girlfriends, drop inappropriate jokes and more, we can offer you all the necessary services and advice to have that speech moving smoother than butter.
Attend the wedding rehearsal
It’s important you attend this. Nobody wants to fluff up their part, especially in front of an audience. A bit of practice makes perfect so don’t be a wally and think you can blag it.
On the big day
The Groom’s Assistant
His trusted wingman. Don’t let the groom down. He will undoubtedly be a tad stressed and on edge – perfectly natural. Be the stellar bestman he knows you to be. Go through a checklist with him and make sure he’s remembered such things as the legal documents, cash, payment envelopes and prompt cards. If he’s leaving straight for his honeymoon, check that he’s packed all his honeymoon essentials.
Transport groom to the wedding breakfast
Whether he’s late or not, it’ going to depend on you. This doesn’t mean you go all Robert De Niro on him like in Ronin and start locking in a couple of tailslides. Get him there in one piece and dignified. Check the traffic reports before you leave so you can plan alternative routes should things get congested.
Take care of the rings
Bit of a biggy. No man wants to be doing a Hugh Grant in Four Weddings and a Funeral, or subbing in a Haribo ring for the real thing. If you are the ring bearer, make sure they’re there in your pocket.
At the ceremony:
Seriously, take care of the rings
Big moments as you ascend towards the bride and groom, you can finally deliver the rings before descending away from the couple, happy in the knowledge that the weighty burden of ring carer is now over.
Act as Official Witness
A sometimes forgotten part of the ceremony, you do not have to do much, but essentially you are there as an authoritative figure to witness the two sweethearts legally bind their marriage and to sign the register at the end of the ceremony.
Escort the maid of honour
Once you’ve wiped those tears away, spruce yourself up and escort the maid of honour. Radiant smiles at the ready.
At the reception:
Assist the photographer
Time to test your herding abilities and you go about wrangling a number of your cohorts to pose for photographs. Epic photo bombing is optional.
Deliver the best man’s speech
The big moment arrives. You’re ready to throw in a couple of hilarious anecdotes, maybe some serious tear jerking memories? Not all speeches need to be long, emphatic expressions of hilarity. Be honest, be sincere and everything will work out.
Read out guest messages
“From Liz and Tom who couldn’t be here today…” etc etc. At this stage everything will most likely seem a doddle after your triumphant best man speech.
Pay outstanding fees
With the groom enjoying the reception, it’s up to you to pay off any outstanding fees, whether that be to the music band, caterers or security. Act like a boss and hand over rolled up cash with rubber bands.
Prepare the car for the ceremony
Novelty ribbon? Check. Back window painted with “Just Married”? Check. Well the wedding wagon is now ready to roll out. If there’s not a bottle of Champagne in the car along with the 2 glasses, put some in there.
After the reception:
Organise grooms suit to be taken back
If his wedding suit has been hired then you don’t want to get stung with any late fees, so be sure to return the grooms suit after the wedding.
Organise wedding gifts to be taken home
Sadly, they’re not for you. But they’re definitely not to be left behind at the venue. Whether you put them in your car and drive them home yourself or organise a courier, you’ll be responsible for all those lovely new shiny gifts that the lucky bride and groom have received.
Not essential, but a definite bonus. Kick start the next day with an epic breakfast and bask in the glory of your best man heroism. Put your feet up, you’ve earned it.
Other ways Staggered can help:
Staggered has a load of great articles and tips helping you with your wedding style. We can give the pro’s and cons of hire suits, or give you a little style inspiration. Want to know what’s good to wear in summer? Dallying with the idea of a tweed country style? Need advice on what colour to dress the groomsmen in? Or need a hand brushing up on your vocab (we didn’t have a clue what a lapel was when we started out)? Find them here.
We’re pretty keen on a decent pair of socks… but that’s not for everyone…unless they’re personalised with your initials stitched into them, in which case we want at least 3 pairs! Something personal shows you care and we have a great selection of ideas.
There’s a responsibility on your shoulders, but it shouldn’t be a weighted burden. Nor should it leave you breathing into a brown paper bag like an asthmatic. We’ve been in those moments when things appear to get on top of you, but with some helpful hints and tips, you can be as relaxed as a hammock on a beach.
Wanting to tone up and trim down a bit of that excess beer gut? Or maybe you just fancy turning yourself into a real life adonis? Whatever your motives, we have the fitness tips and diets to get you into shape. If you’re not looking for that and just want to know what you can do to make yourself look your best on the big day, we have advice on the best products and shops to visit.
We’ve come over all Cosmo with wedding sex tips and advice for you. Whether you want to know how to get her screaming louder than Maria Sharapova at Wimbledon or the best tips for pulling at a wedding, we have you covered, you stud.
Want to know why having two best men is wrong or how to have a best woman? Plus who would be the best celebrity Best Man?
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