Published on December 10th, 2012 | by Matthew Young0
Top Ten New Sports to Try in 2014
Going to the gym too ‘mainstream’ for you? Well my fat hipster friend, Kick off your New Year’s resolution training regime with the help of these 10 new sports to try get you well on your way back into those skinny jeans for spring.
Bossaball is a hybrid sport of Volleyball, Football, Trampoline, Gymnastics and Capoeria, which is a Brazilian Martial Art. It takes place upon a giant inflatable volleyball style pitch, where the rules are practically the same as volleyball, but you can use any part of your body and due to the addition of the bouncy castle type floor, you now have matrix style, gravity defying moves.
9: Camel races
Camels are the Jet Ski’s of the desert. Jump upon one and mush away. This sport is extremely popular in Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, Egypt, the United Arab Emirates and Qatar. Practically anywhere where there are Camels then.
8: Dwarf Throwing
Grab a Dwarf covered in Velcro and throw him/her at a wall, simple. Believe it or not the Dwarves don’t mind. Well, they consent to it at least, so it’s not like the organisers are running round collecting dwarf for their somewhat politically incorrect fun. I’m sure somewhere there is Giant Throwing too but I don’t think that would be as popular.
Grab your balls and go for a jog and juggle, impressive at the park, scary in the dark. Especially if your balls glow in the dark.
6: Three Sided Football
Played on a Hexagonal shaped pitch, three-sided football was devised by the Danish Situationist Asger Jorn to explain his notion of triolectics, which is a refinement on the Marxian concept of dialectics. If that isn’t too difficult for you to understand, the rules will be simple. Rather than the team with the most goals scored winning the match, the winning team is the team that lets in the least amount of goals out of the three.
5: Anything in or underwater
As we all know, sports are far more energy consuming underwater, part of the reason being the restricted movement and the lack of oxygen, which obviously means they are more fun. Games like Octopush (underwater hockey) and Underwater rugby take place in swimming pools all over the world. One of the strangest is the Harpoon-Based sport, underwater target shooting. Perfect practise for the budding Captain Ahab in all of us. Underwater Boxing is also recommended.
We’ve all seen this in adverts and on Saturday morning kids shows, but you would be amazed in the amount of energy this takes out of you. I would suggest a conker-based format where you and a friend climb the top of either hill in a valley and roll down into a big bouncy collision. Trying to steer one of those big balls is hard work but loads of laughs.
3: Skin Kicking
Yeah, just swipe the shins from under your mates legs, really hack at them. True fun is cheap, shin pads are optional.
2: Chess Boxing
Brains & Brawn are needed for this one. Chess and Boxing at the same time, works in a round type format, six rounds of chess and five rounds of boxing. The match can be won either way, so if you feel you are close to being checkmated upon, you better start swinging for that Knock Out!
The best of the new sports to try: Real Ale Wobble & Ramble
Kind of counter productive if you are looking for something to make you healthier, but the Mid Wales Beer Festival wobble and ramble is something all sportsmen and women should try at least once. The wobble is an alcohol fuelled 10, 20 or 35 mile mountain bike ride through the heart of Wales (mostly off road due to alcohol consumption) stopping of at various watering holes along the way. The Ramble is practically the same as the Wobble, but on foot.
So there you go, ten new sports for you to master in the New Year and you’ll have yourself a lovely hot-bod for the summer. That or one fantastic Beer belly!